Sunday 9 January 2011

New

It is dropping
Into those pebbles
And now I know why I had to walk.
Until my tears mixed with the rain
In a torrent down my poor, tired
face
Because my heart had stopped.
It broke and it wrenched and it
stopped me from feeling like I could breathe
Until I couldn't say a word because
every
Thing
And every
Thought
Was too painful.

Every step hurt.
It hurt my feet and my stitch
and my being
Until the tears couldn't mix with
the rain any more and I was just
crying.
On my own.

With every foot forward, my
exhausted mind took two steps
back
I was on my own still
Walking in a straight line but never having felt so sorry and so twisted.
It tore at me with every
remembrance of every scenario of
every word
Until it turned into a lighter drizzle
That let me take off my hood and
shake my hair loose
And look at the sun and the beauty
behind the rain
And to realise that there is so
much to see.
Even when you feel like there
might be no more good and no
more beauty beyond this pain,
there is light and there is colour
and there is a smile,